A Letter to My Psoriasis - Roseanne

Roseanne has kindly shared this beautiful and deeply personal piece about living with psoriasis. Through powerful imagery, she reflects on her relationship with her psoriasis, from wanting it gone, to learning to accept it as part of who she is.

You arrived on my doorstep without invitation.
I had no reason to question your company, believing you were but a fleeting visitor.

I was just hospitable enough for you to stay a while, and you grew comfortable.
This body became your home too, so when I tried to evict you, you’d flee temporarily, scurrying away after I threatened you with cocktails of poison.

And each time I embraced the relief, celebrated, redecorated, back you were in my home, each time more stubborn than the last. How dare I eject you from a place that was now ours?

So you took up space, hanging red fairy lights and sculptures in every room to be marvelled at. Little did I know, I was the art gallery for your work.

I saw different, awkward, unsightly, not the original masterpiece you wanted me to be, so I continued to throw water on an inexhaustible fire.
The flames often faded to embers but always burned.

I would starve you of everything you liked, making this home as inhospitable as possible, but you lay your claim, painting every room bright and bold hues of red, convinced that beauty was in the eye of the beholder.

One day, I grew tired in my own home and I embraced you as the housemate you were so desperate to be.
Stay, if you want.
These rubies don’t look so bad on me after all.

Before you arrived on my doorstep without invitation, I never loved my home for what it was, is — powerful, beautiful, resilient, extra-ordinary.
Now I love it for all of its petals and thorns - pale, bruised, scarred, flaked, fiery.

So the next time you visit, I’ll let you in without hesitation, but when the day comes that you find a new muse, I hope you’ll leave everything as you found it on that very first day.

RB.